deerstalker
http://www.thenerdelement.com/2017/08/12/killjoys-s03e07-recap-review/
It’s a case of good news/bad news/worse news. The good news…Johnny’s come up with an awesome scheme that allows anyone to fly the super cool fighters. The bad news, Dutch and Zeph are MIA.
The worse news? Johnny’s test doesn’t go so well. Alvis is the first to notice the two fighters are mirroring each other. They try to correct course but it’s too late. Turin is right there to provide Johnny with some encouragement. I’m thinking if this whole RAC thing doesn’t go well for him, he totally has a future as a motivational speaker.
Haha no.
D’avin gets him to back off but the damage is done. Johnny is upset and rightly so that the test failed. Not only did they lose good people in the test, they have no way to pilot the fighters. Dutch’s disappearing act doesn’t help his mood either. He tries to reach her but…nothing.
Zeph has locked Johnny out from his ability to find her and Dutch. In other news, we now know “Zeph” is a verb.
Zeph gets Dutch in a chair at a defunct Company lab and proceeds to zeph Dutch and the micro brain slices so Dutch can see precisely what memories Khlyen kept hidden. They’re Aneela’s memories, no doubt about it.
The first thing Dutch accesses is Aneela’s memory of Khlyen removing some of her memories. Per Khlyen, if anyone finds out what Aneela did, an unknown and ominous “she” will come for her.
The next set of memories are from Aneela’s childhood. Young Aneela’s on a beach with her papa and they’re looking up at Arkyn from Qresh. He’s planning to move them (him and Aneela) to their future but Aneela’s not happy about it and neither is Mrs. Khlyen. He replies by telling her that Qresh is dying and she could get a piece that or move on to something better.
Dutch impatiently urges Zeph to move on, noting only that she now knows Khlyen was Qreshi. But she wants to get to the good stuff, i.e., anything that can help with the war. She didn’t realize how important those memories actually are until later. Zeph warns her about how dangerous it is for her to do this walk through Aneela’s memory lane but Dutch is adamant.
Her next set of memories is much more gruesome. A grown up Aneela has been experimenting on people to try to perfect the way the green bonds with humans. She’s trying to find a way to fix herself. She feels broken because she can feel at all. Khlyen tries to counsel her to move on from her human past and Aneela tells him that the green speaks to her and “she” says not to trust him anymore.
Back at the RAC, Turin goes after D’avin about Dutch being missing and them not having any strategy. A Ferran rep shows up and he too isn’t pleased Dutch is a no-show but D’avin gives him his word they’ll get her back and soon. But Turin has a mission for him in the meantime: Find Fancy. If anyone knows how to fly the ships it’ll be Khlyen’s former right hand man.
Johnny overheard that exchange and had even more bad news for D’avin. The Remnant is missing too, as well as some pertinent research. D’avin realizes Zeph’s going to inject brain stuff into Dutch so Johnny decides to take mobile app Lucy to find them and D’avin takes off to find and woo Fancy back to the fold. Good luck with that, D’av.
Meanwhile Dutch is witnessing a new set of memories, now in one of those weird metallic cube thingies. Khlyen and Aneela are there playing the equivalent of Qreshi gambling games and he fills her in on the latest happenings on Qresh. Their family name has been struck from the record while the other Nine families try to figure out what to do about the Hullen ultimatum he forwarded. (I guess that means they were the TEN at some point, no?) Soon colonization can begin and all will be well. Except for Aneela of course. She flips when he gets up to leave her there and he notices a piece of fruit and asks her where it came from. She has secrets too, it seems.
Back on Westerley, D’avin finds Fancy fighting in the streets but it’s all in good fun. Fancy gives him a little grief but finally relents and answers D’avin’s questions about what went wrong with the flight test. Turns out the ships form neural links so a single pilot can fly them. Unfortunately basic humans won’t do the trick. It has to be done by those who’s brains have been Hullen hardwired. And Fancy warns him, most of the Cleansed just want to get on with their lives and recover from what the Hullen did to them in peace.
But D’avin presses. They just need 34 people and Fancy says he’ll try but only if D’avin has their back. He and the others are tired of the prejudices of ignorant people who look at the Cleansed as though they were still the enemy. His next stop is the Royale to talk to the Ferran rep, trying to keep him from bolting.
In the meantime, Johnny’s traveling and trying to access Lucy’s systems remotely. That…doesn’t work out.
Princess Leia holo-Zeph tells Johnny she’s trying to help Dutch but help the team too. So solve this super tough math puzzle and find them if they don’t return first.
Dutch sees more and more of Aneela’s memories. Now she’s by herself and jabbing her neck, bleeding green and storing it. Building it up. Aneela had been wanting the green, but Khlyen’s been keeping her from it. So this is her solution to escape her cube, which is for her a prison, not a refuge.
And as Dutch continues to watch, she becomes more agitated until she hears a familiar tune and sees the impossible. Aneela dancing with a very young Dutch! *LE GASP*
Zeph and Dutch try to unravel that freaky reveal. Dutch thinks Aneela’s her mother but Zeph assures her there’s no way. The Hullen can’t breed. Uh Zeph, I hate to harsh your mellow but apparently you missed the last scene of last week’s episode. You might want to check on that.
Dutch’s questions remain. Why was she with her as a child? Why does she look like her? And Zeph’s like okay, go back in and see what’s up but please stay chill in there, mmkay? Otherwise Dutch could get lost in Aneela’s memories and die. And Zeph would not be okay with that scenario. At all.
Back on Westerley, Fancy’s arguing with another of the Cleansed who thinks gathering them in one place is dangerous. Fancy says he trusts Jaqobis. That is until they come upon a raid of Turin’s goons storming a Cleansed hideout. The timing and logistics point to one thing: It was a trap.
Fancy’s first stop is the Royale to find D’avin and punch him in the face.
Fancy tells him what happened to the Cleansed, what Turin did. He also emphasized the point they’re screwed since now they have no one to fly the ships.
Meanwhile, Johnny’s figured out Zeph’s test in way less than 7 hours. Really Zeph? DNA strands? Mobile app Lucy spools up and provides Johnny with the details of Dutch’s whereabouts.
Dutch is reviewing more of Aneela’s memories of her time with young Dutch. They get to a point where Aneela wants her help to get free when Dutch is pulled from that memory and thrust into another. It’s the memory of when Dutch met Khlyen in the harem for the first time except she’s seeing this experience through Aneela’s eyes.
Khlyen catches up with Aneela wondering how she escaped and who Dutch is. When Aneela confesses he’s the father, present day Dutch flips out and winds up in another memory. This one hers. It was her wedding night when she killed the prince! She sees Khlyen and immediately starts seizing.
Zeph rushes to action and and revives her, but it’s too late. Dutch is trapped reliving her memory. She sees Zeph as a threat and slashes at her throat before escaping.
Thankfully she’s not languishing for long. Johnny arrives and finds her on the floor, hurt but not badly so. Zeph explains what happened and Johnny realizes what memory she’s trapped in.
Mind fracked Yalena boards Lucy and hears…rock music in her memory. Johnny’s on board and trying to steal Lucy but Lucy doesn’t do a thing to help him since he’s a thief. She does let him know they’re not alone anymore as Dutch arrives with a gun pointed at him. She tries to get him off the ship but he tells her he knows who she is and that he wants to help her while helping himself at the same time. We learn Lucy was a wedding gift (I’ve always wondered about that!) and Johnny helps promise to help her fly it in exchange for him getting off world.
Just then, real life interrupts the memory and current Johnny approaches her. She’s still out of it but he tries to Johnny his way past her defenses. She responds by shooting him! Thankfully he’s wearing a vest and is none the worse for wear.
Back at the RAC, D’avin is none pleased with Turin for using him and Fancy to round up the Cleansed. Turin gives a typical response about not trusting the Cleansed because they could turn on them. It’s sad how minds like his forget how many humans have betrayed them for a taste of immortality.
Turin tries to throw his weight around about his so called strategic call but Alvis, speaking for the Scarbacks, the Ferran and pretty much everyone else thinks he made a dick move.
Thankfully D’avin overrules it and frees the Cleansed. Plus, he has more good news: they’ve agreed to pilot the ships. D’avin makes a rousing speech about not turning on each other and Turin sees it as a challenge to his leadership. He also claims Dutch is only in the war to go after Aneela and that she’d risk everyone to do it, which is just not true nor is it fair.
D’avin isn’t impressed and has Turin arrested for sedition and…something else. Probably something to do with his hair.
Turin thinks the others back him but that is not the case. The Ferran, the Scarbacks and the rest of the gang all line up on Team D’avin. His defense of the Cleansed and passion to fight for freedom showed them his heart and his character.
Back in the old Company lab, Dutch makes her plea with Johnny. She needs to go back inside even if there’s no tactical advantage. She has to know. Thankfully Johnny’s Johnny and he backs her 100%. He’s on team Dutch all the way. He’s loyal like that, like a golden retriever puppy, only more badass.
Dutch apologizes to Zeph for the whole knife slashy thing and Zeph zephs her back to the harem scene again.
Khlyen is confronting Aneela about her mini-me and Aneela confesses she missed him so much, missed what they used to be that she relived her memories over and over. She tells him she used her own green to revisit those memories and bring the young her back as a gift to Khlyen, so he can have his daughter back, but one untainted by Arkyn and all that followed. Maybe now he can forgive her for not being good enough. I need a box of Kleenex please because that’s just heart rending.
Khlyen is intent on protecting Aneela from the Lady (<—-???) by killing the girl for all of three seconds until the little girl turns to look at him. And he’s lost once more. He advises her, talks to her with love. He also tells her who she is: Yalena Yardeen. She responds by saying the name is considered shameful but Khlyen insists maybe she can restore honor to the name. Her father is counting on it. That phrase has so much more meaning now that we know the truth of who she is.
Thankfully, puppy Johnny is on hand for snuggles when Dutch returns from that set of memories.
On the RAC, D’avin finds a very pensive Fancy and checks in on him.
Fancy does something remarkable: He shares what he’s really thinking and feeling. He tells D’avin what Kitaan (the Hullen he interrogated in Attack the Rack) said about the Cleansed not being cured, that they’re only in remission. And D’avin reminds him the Hullen lie and then tells him straight up: horrible things happen in war and even shares with him about how he killed his own squad. The only thing D’avin can ask for is loyalty, which he asks Fancy for. Fancy says yes and D’avin promises his own in return.
At the old Company lab, Johnny partially patches Zeph up (she wants a scar) and praises her for her work. She helped Dutch and the team. I think the nerds are totally bonding!
When everyone finally gets back on Lucy, D’avin gently confronts Dutch about taking off. He wants her to confide in him but she just…can’t. She realizes she’s not in the right headspace for command and passes the baton of leadership to D’avin.
The Wolf You Feed is easily one of my favorite Killjoys episodes across the seasons. On top of finally learning who Dutch is and where she came from (the implications of which is staggering), we also get Johnny and Dutch’s introduction to each other and Johnny and Zeph showing how far they’d go to protect Dutch and help her out. I’m really warming up to Zeph and she’s a perfect complement to the team.
On the flip side, D’avin held everyone else together by being an honorable, principled man. That resonated with Fancy and the Cleansed as well as the Ferran and the Scarbacks. I’m glad Dutch handed command over to him though. As much as I longed for Dutch leading them all into battle, she’s got her own demons to deal with and it was wise of her to realize the truth of it. On top of that, we finally saw Turin get called out and be held accountable for his actions. Last but not least, Fancy really shone in this episode. No he’s still not 100% but he still proved he trusted D’avin enough (punchy face moment aside) to share his personal issues.
All the above is to say I LOVED this episode and give it 10 dreadnoughts out of a possible 10.
The post Killjoys S03E07 Recap/Review: Yesterday’s Girl appeared first on The Nerd Element.
It’s a case of good news/bad news/worse news. The good news…Johnny’s come up with an awesome scheme that allows anyone to fly the super cool fighters. The bad news, Dutch and Zeph are MIA.
The worse news? Johnny’s test doesn’t go so well. Alvis is the first to notice the two fighters are mirroring each other. They try to correct course but it’s too late. Turin is right there to provide Johnny with some encouragement. I’m thinking if this whole RAC thing doesn’t go well for him, he totally has a future as a motivational speaker.
Haha no.
D’avin gets him to back off but the damage is done. Johnny is upset and rightly so that the test failed. Not only did they lose good people in the test, they have no way to pilot the fighters. Dutch’s disappearing act doesn’t help his mood either. He tries to reach her but…nothing.
Zeph has locked Johnny out from his ability to find her and Dutch. In other news, we now know “Zeph” is a verb.
Zeph gets Dutch in a chair at a defunct Company lab and proceeds to zeph Dutch and the micro brain slices so Dutch can see precisely what memories Khlyen kept hidden. They’re Aneela’s memories, no doubt about it.
The first thing Dutch accesses is Aneela’s memory of Khlyen removing some of her memories. Per Khlyen, if anyone finds out what Aneela did, an unknown and ominous “she” will come for her.
The next set of memories are from Aneela’s childhood. Young Aneela’s on a beach with her papa and they’re looking up at Arkyn from Qresh. He’s planning to move them (him and Aneela) to their future but Aneela’s not happy about it and neither is Mrs. Khlyen. He replies by telling her that Qresh is dying and she could get a piece that or move on to something better.
Dutch impatiently urges Zeph to move on, noting only that she now knows Khlyen was Qreshi. But she wants to get to the good stuff, i.e., anything that can help with the war. She didn’t realize how important those memories actually are until later. Zeph warns her about how dangerous it is for her to do this walk through Aneela’s memory lane but Dutch is adamant.
Her next set of memories is much more gruesome. A grown up Aneela has been experimenting on people to try to perfect the way the green bonds with humans. She’s trying to find a way to fix herself. She feels broken because she can feel at all. Khlyen tries to counsel her to move on from her human past and Aneela tells him that the green speaks to her and “she” says not to trust him anymore.
Back at the RAC, Turin goes after D’avin about Dutch being missing and them not having any strategy. A Ferran rep shows up and he too isn’t pleased Dutch is a no-show but D’avin gives him his word they’ll get her back and soon. But Turin has a mission for him in the meantime: Find Fancy. If anyone knows how to fly the ships it’ll be Khlyen’s former right hand man.
Johnny overheard that exchange and had even more bad news for D’avin. The Remnant is missing too, as well as some pertinent research. D’avin realizes Zeph’s going to inject brain stuff into Dutch so Johnny decides to take mobile app Lucy to find them and D’avin takes off to find and woo Fancy back to the fold. Good luck with that, D’av.
Meanwhile Dutch is witnessing a new set of memories, now in one of those weird metallic cube thingies. Khlyen and Aneela are there playing the equivalent of Qreshi gambling games and he fills her in on the latest happenings on Qresh. Their family name has been struck from the record while the other Nine families try to figure out what to do about the Hullen ultimatum he forwarded. (I guess that means they were the TEN at some point, no?) Soon colonization can begin and all will be well. Except for Aneela of course. She flips when he gets up to leave her there and he notices a piece of fruit and asks her where it came from. She has secrets too, it seems.
Back on Westerley, D’avin finds Fancy fighting in the streets but it’s all in good fun. Fancy gives him a little grief but finally relents and answers D’avin’s questions about what went wrong with the flight test. Turns out the ships form neural links so a single pilot can fly them. Unfortunately basic humans won’t do the trick. It has to be done by those who’s brains have been Hullen hardwired. And Fancy warns him, most of the Cleansed just want to get on with their lives and recover from what the Hullen did to them in peace.
But D’avin presses. They just need 34 people and Fancy says he’ll try but only if D’avin has their back. He and the others are tired of the prejudices of ignorant people who look at the Cleansed as though they were still the enemy. His next stop is the Royale to talk to the Ferran rep, trying to keep him from bolting.
In the meantime, Johnny’s traveling and trying to access Lucy’s systems remotely. That…doesn’t work out.
Princess Leia holo-Zeph tells Johnny she’s trying to help Dutch but help the team too. So solve this super tough math puzzle and find them if they don’t return first.
Dutch sees more and more of Aneela’s memories. Now she’s by herself and jabbing her neck, bleeding green and storing it. Building it up. Aneela had been wanting the green, but Khlyen’s been keeping her from it. So this is her solution to escape her cube, which is for her a prison, not a refuge.
And as Dutch continues to watch, she becomes more agitated until she hears a familiar tune and sees the impossible. Aneela dancing with a very young Dutch! *LE GASP*
Zeph and Dutch try to unravel that freaky reveal. Dutch thinks Aneela’s her mother but Zeph assures her there’s no way. The Hullen can’t breed. Uh Zeph, I hate to harsh your mellow but apparently you missed the last scene of last week’s episode. You might want to check on that.
Dutch’s questions remain. Why was she with her as a child? Why does she look like her? And Zeph’s like okay, go back in and see what’s up but please stay chill in there, mmkay? Otherwise Dutch could get lost in Aneela’s memories and die. And Zeph would not be okay with that scenario. At all.
Back on Westerley, Fancy’s arguing with another of the Cleansed who thinks gathering them in one place is dangerous. Fancy says he trusts Jaqobis. That is until they come upon a raid of Turin’s goons storming a Cleansed hideout. The timing and logistics point to one thing: It was a trap.
Fancy’s first stop is the Royale to find D’avin and punch him in the face.
Fancy tells him what happened to the Cleansed, what Turin did. He also emphasized the point they’re screwed since now they have no one to fly the ships.
Meanwhile, Johnny’s figured out Zeph’s test in way less than 7 hours. Really Zeph? DNA strands? Mobile app Lucy spools up and provides Johnny with the details of Dutch’s whereabouts.
Dutch is reviewing more of Aneela’s memories of her time with young Dutch. They get to a point where Aneela wants her help to get free when Dutch is pulled from that memory and thrust into another. It’s the memory of when Dutch met Khlyen in the harem for the first time except she’s seeing this experience through Aneela’s eyes.
Khlyen catches up with Aneela wondering how she escaped and who Dutch is. When Aneela confesses he’s the father, present day Dutch flips out and winds up in another memory. This one hers. It was her wedding night when she killed the prince! She sees Khlyen and immediately starts seizing.
Zeph rushes to action and and revives her, but it’s too late. Dutch is trapped reliving her memory. She sees Zeph as a threat and slashes at her throat before escaping.
Thankfully she’s not languishing for long. Johnny arrives and finds her on the floor, hurt but not badly so. Zeph explains what happened and Johnny realizes what memory she’s trapped in.
Mind fracked Yalena boards Lucy and hears…rock music in her memory. Johnny’s on board and trying to steal Lucy but Lucy doesn’t do a thing to help him since he’s a thief. She does let him know they’re not alone anymore as Dutch arrives with a gun pointed at him. She tries to get him off the ship but he tells her he knows who she is and that he wants to help her while helping himself at the same time. We learn Lucy was a wedding gift (I’ve always wondered about that!) and Johnny helps promise to help her fly it in exchange for him getting off world.
Just then, real life interrupts the memory and current Johnny approaches her. She’s still out of it but he tries to Johnny his way past her defenses. She responds by shooting him! Thankfully he’s wearing a vest and is none the worse for wear.
Back at the RAC, D’avin is none pleased with Turin for using him and Fancy to round up the Cleansed. Turin gives a typical response about not trusting the Cleansed because they could turn on them. It’s sad how minds like his forget how many humans have betrayed them for a taste of immortality.
Turin tries to throw his weight around about his so called strategic call but Alvis, speaking for the Scarbacks, the Ferran and pretty much everyone else thinks he made a dick move.
Thankfully D’avin overrules it and frees the Cleansed. Plus, he has more good news: they’ve agreed to pilot the ships. D’avin makes a rousing speech about not turning on each other and Turin sees it as a challenge to his leadership. He also claims Dutch is only in the war to go after Aneela and that she’d risk everyone to do it, which is just not true nor is it fair.
D’avin isn’t impressed and has Turin arrested for sedition and…something else. Probably something to do with his hair.
Turin thinks the others back him but that is not the case. The Ferran, the Scarbacks and the rest of the gang all line up on Team D’avin. His defense of the Cleansed and passion to fight for freedom showed them his heart and his character.
Back in the old Company lab, Dutch makes her plea with Johnny. She needs to go back inside even if there’s no tactical advantage. She has to know. Thankfully Johnny’s Johnny and he backs her 100%. He’s on team Dutch all the way. He’s loyal like that, like a golden retriever puppy, only more badass.
Dutch apologizes to Zeph for the whole knife slashy thing and Zeph zephs her back to the harem scene again.
Khlyen is confronting Aneela about her mini-me and Aneela confesses she missed him so much, missed what they used to be that she relived her memories over and over. She tells him she used her own green to revisit those memories and bring the young her back as a gift to Khlyen, so he can have his daughter back, but one untainted by Arkyn and all that followed. Maybe now he can forgive her for not being good enough. I need a box of Kleenex please because that’s just heart rending.
Khlyen is intent on protecting Aneela from the Lady (<—-???) by killing the girl for all of three seconds until the little girl turns to look at him. And he’s lost once more. He advises her, talks to her with love. He also tells her who she is: Yalena Yardeen. She responds by saying the name is considered shameful but Khlyen insists maybe she can restore honor to the name. Her father is counting on it. That phrase has so much more meaning now that we know the truth of who she is.
Thankfully, puppy Johnny is on hand for snuggles when Dutch returns from that set of memories.
On the RAC, D’avin finds a very pensive Fancy and checks in on him.
Fancy does something remarkable: He shares what he’s really thinking and feeling. He tells D’avin what Kitaan (the Hullen he interrogated in Attack the Rack) said about the Cleansed not being cured, that they’re only in remission. And D’avin reminds him the Hullen lie and then tells him straight up: horrible things happen in war and even shares with him about how he killed his own squad. The only thing D’avin can ask for is loyalty, which he asks Fancy for. Fancy says yes and D’avin promises his own in return.
At the old Company lab, Johnny partially patches Zeph up (she wants a scar) and praises her for her work. She helped Dutch and the team. I think the nerds are totally bonding!
When everyone finally gets back on Lucy, D’avin gently confronts Dutch about taking off. He wants her to confide in him but she just…can’t. She realizes she’s not in the right headspace for command and passes the baton of leadership to D’avin.
The Wolf You Feed is easily one of my favorite Killjoys episodes across the seasons. On top of finally learning who Dutch is and where she came from (the implications of which is staggering), we also get Johnny and Dutch’s introduction to each other and Johnny and Zeph showing how far they’d go to protect Dutch and help her out. I’m really warming up to Zeph and she’s a perfect complement to the team.
On the flip side, D’avin held everyone else together by being an honorable, principled man. That resonated with Fancy and the Cleansed as well as the Ferran and the Scarbacks. I’m glad Dutch handed command over to him though. As much as I longed for Dutch leading them all into battle, she’s got her own demons to deal with and it was wise of her to realize the truth of it. On top of that, we finally saw Turin get called out and be held accountable for his actions. Last but not least, Fancy really shone in this episode. No he’s still not 100% but he still proved he trusted D’avin enough (punchy face moment aside) to share his personal issues.
All the above is to say I LOVED this episode and give it 10 dreadnoughts out of a possible 10.
The post Killjoys S03E07 Recap/Review: Yesterday’s Girl appeared first on The Nerd Element.
Warning: MAJOR spoilers for the podcast Alice Isn’t Dead. Seriously, if you aren’t caught up on this amazing series I suggest you wait.
So I’m on my way home from work and fighting tears as Keisha (who has just found out that the organization she thought was protecting her from bloodthirsty serial killers is actually all a ruse by the US government), desperately attempts to escape Watcher (who insists on psychologically mangling Keisha before physically doing so), when all of a sudden I realize it: I don’t want Alice and Keisha to get back together.
Don’t get me wrong, it feels like a bizarre conclusion to come to after two seasons of a show literally named for the protagonist’s last shred of hope through a dismal existence plagued by mysterious monstrous beings and inexplicable occurrences. In fact, I’m such a fan of this series that this isn’t even the first time I’ve written about how inspiring listening to another queer (very probably Black) woman struggle with and survive mental illness, heartbreak, and loneliness can be. And yet, here we are at another season finale with Alice ex machina busting in to the rescue and something feels… wrong.
Image by Tumblr user cathartes–aura
The realization starts with the nagging question that the episode gets its title from: Why am I still alive? At first, Keisha thinks it must be because there is a role Bay and Creek has chosen for her (very similar to the role Alice’s disappearance forced her into). Then Watcher coerces her into thinking it’s simply an accident that has been allowed by her killer’s own whims. Then finally it seems to be because Keisha herself fights back and refuses to submit to the will imposed on her by others. Except this moment never gets to happen, not really. The answer becomes Alice the moment she steps in and it feels like an insultingly easy conclusion to Keisha’s character arc.
Maybe it’s because I went through my own painful break-up of sorts recently that Alice seems so undeserving of this spotlight. To be clear, I was the Alice. I made a choice that I thought was in everyone’s best interest but instead hurt people very dear to me because it turned out to be selfish and self-serving. Alice is no different. While the truth may be that at the beginning of the series Keisha simply didn’t have the capacity that she does now to comprehend (much less survive) the terror and slaughter brought about by the Thistle Men, Alice still chose to sacrifice the relationship she promised a lifetime commitment to without the input of her partner. Even if Alice thought she was protecting her wife, she chose to undertake two responsibilities that she had to know were incompatible regardless of which came first. It hardly seems fair for Keisha to endure all of this emotional trauma only for Alice to swoop in and acquire her dependency all over again without really earning it. “I was wrong, I’m sorry,” Alice pleads weakly at the end of the episode. “Will you come with me?” As if, given the fatal circumstances, Keisha has a choice.
Actress Jasika Nicole plays Keisha on Alice Isn’t Dead and Dana Cardinal on Night Vale Presents’ original podcast, Welcome to Night Vale. Image ©2012 Fox Broadcasting Co. CR: Kharen Hill/FOX
Don’t get me wrong, I understand the impulse to grab for the representation of a happy ending in a world where queer folks are treated just as dispensable in reality as fiction, if not worse. But I think it’s just as valuable to force your characters to solve their interpersonal problems as mature adults despite the cruel facade of war they’re being subjected to. What I think listeners deserve is more of the difficult grappling with identity and the necessary growth that comes with triumph. Alice doesn’t get to just apologize for the irreparable damage she’s caused and continue on her mission, she needs to really make time to explain herself and attempt to make things right. And then realize if Keisha doesn’t take her back, if she doesn’t forgive her, she has every right to. Because that’s a consequence of hurting someone, even if you love them. You don’t always get a chance to ride off into the sunset together. Sometimes the relationship doesn’t recover.
I’m not saying I want to see anyone punished; I think this series has more than enough proven how wicked the world can be. I do, however, want to learn from Keisha and Alice what I still struggle so hard to manifest in the real world. I want to see Keisha develop even further into a person who, if not completely confident in her own abilities, at least is comfortable in engaging with her fears on her own. Whose reasons for action and living are not wrapped up in one person. I want to see how Alice demonstrates healthy atonement. How she shifts through guilt and longing and finds a way to define herself beyond the life-altering decision she’s made. Because Alice isn’t dead and neither is Keisha. They both still have the agency to be the best selves they can be and in turn teach us how to do the same. That’s why I don’t want Alice and Keisha to get back together right now. Not yet. It should be a choice that’s earned.
You can download Alice Isn’t Dead today on your favorite podcast service.
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As a Black and Latinx individual being raised in white suburbia, it can be difficult to find representation in mainstream media for your unique experience. You never feel like you are less Black, but apparently everyone tells you that you are. You are reminded everyday that you are a strong Black woman, but loving Fleetwood Mac, The Doors, and Whitney Houston confuses a lot of people who believe what they see on TV as Black. You can imagine my excitement when I heard a show called Blackish was going to be on prime-time television.
Unfortunately for me, Blackish was just that, a good show-ish. The show follows a well-to-do family, the Johnsons, in the suburbs of California (specifically SoCal area) and their lives as a Black family growing in white suburbia. The family consists of mother Rainbow, bi-racial and raised in a hippie household, who prides herself on being a successful doctor; Dre, the “started from the bottom now we’re here” father from Compton, now living in the suburbs working as a marketing agent at a top marketing firm, head of the “urban division” (which they address in the first episode); and their 4 children, who are the subject of Dre’s concern throughout the show that they are indeed not growing up with the necessary Black experience he remembers.
In the first episode, we see Dre worry obsessively that his family is not “Black enough.” Seeing his son enjoy nerdom and his family all around not participating in “traditional Black culture.” By the end of the episode we see Dre dressed in dashiki cloth doing some sort of ritual in the back yard. I was immediately disappointed that I was not going to be able to relate to a show that seemed to be made specifically for me.
Some coercion from my sister, bless her ability of foresight, convinced me to keep watching. As the episodes went on, I realized I was thinking of this in a singular fashion and much too far ahead of the reality of the times. Blackish is a sitcom, like any other sitcom, but it does in fact bring to light the different existences of Black life. It touches on the dichotomy of having to live within white standards but also live with the knowledge of your history and existence as a person of color. Dre is the quintessential epitome of this dichotomy.
Dre is a man who grew up in “the hood”, Compton to be exact. He loves sneakers, looking fresh, and trying to be authentic and often wrestles with this in his adult life in relation to his upbringing. The presence of his parents, Pops (Laurence Fishburne), and his mother, Ruby (Jenifer Lewis), (both of whom do a superb job – of course) play a big role in the classic nature vs. nurture element of the show. What we see through the show is Dre’s ideas of authenticity in Blackness are very much topical and he begins to learn from his family the nuances of being Black. From his love for his wife and his struggle to understand his son Junior, to his adoration for his oldest daughter Zoe, the show truly brings in a narrative we do not see in prime time.
I ended up loving the show, season three is much better than the rest, but I watched the show touch on so many issues that affect people of color in a witty and also serious fashion. From the antics at Dre’s office and his white co-workers to the way they bring in Rainbow’s family — being mixed while also growing up in an environment based on holistic life and the paths this takes POC folks on. I’m reminded of the episode in which Junior dates a white girl and Rainbow has to wrestle with why this bothers her. In another episode, the youngest son Jack uses the N word in school and the consequences and complicated nature of this, not only for him, but for the word in general, are touched on. I have seen the show address police brutality in a bottle episode, playing out the desires we as people of color feel to come together and stand up for justice, and addressing our feelings of rage and at the same time our fears. There’s an episode that tackles the election and all sides if it, from Trump supporters, to rights to vote, to the long-standing oppression of POC in this nation by our government.
The thing that really brings the show home are the children — they are the device for the inner message of the show and the core family values. Jack and Diane, twins and the youngest of the bunch, are the ying and yang. Diane is smart and cynical, while Jack is funny and loves to entertain. Junior loves Dungeons & Dragons, video games, and, of course, is an avid Lord of the Rings aficionado (aren’t we all!). Then there’s Zoe, a beautiful young woman, who takes after her father in personality and is seen as the popular social media queen.
All of these characters together make up an array of Black “other” life that I could not truly acknowledge at the beginning. Not often do you see a sitcom that is willing to take that step and show you the wide reach of Black culture and Black life.
Of course it is still a sitcom, so we have to sit through the sappy moments, the corny episodes, and the jokes to placate the audience, but that in itself is a privilege. They do bring in some questionable characters, (Raven Simone on a show about Blackness when she claims to not see color? and Chris Brown…) but it really is something to have a sitcom of Black life that isn’t a period piece, isn’t about a hard knock life, or isn’t trying to overcompensate for oppression.
All in all, I was getting ahead of myself. I wanted to see a show that delved deeply into the nuances of Black “other” life or some experience that truly made me feel like my existence was not to be made fun of or ridiculed, a show that stood up for people like me not being called “oreos.” In reality, there is an era emerging in media and entertainment that is providing a pathway for the new narrative — Blackish does this. And Tracee Ellis Ross does the damn thing in this show! #actorgoals!
It is refreshing to see a sitcom in the modern world that addresses the fact that a variety of Blackness even exists at all. Check out the new season of Blackish coming back this Fall.
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