deerstalker

https://madamenoire.com/1070861/experts-weigh-in-on-if-love-at-first-sight-is-a-real-thing-or-not/

 

It can be a wild feeling to meet someone for the first time and feel instant fireworks and attraction. While it’s easy to get caught up in the raging emotions of “love at first sight,” that feeling, unsubstantiated by actual compatibility and lifestyle fit, remains just that—a feeling. Relationships need more than feeling. True partnership requires mutual respect, listening, empathy, kindness and matching goals, ambitions and values.

So even though love at first sight is a thing, we should be careful with how much we let it dictate our lives.

“That very strong electrical feeling that people say they have—that’s very much possible,” Niloo Dardashti, PhD, a psychologist and relationship expert in New York City told Cosmo. 

“With love, we’re talking about things like intimacy, tolerating somebody’s flaws, seeing them as a whole person and still liking them, and so on. That’s a lot of stuff that generally doesn’t happen in the first moment you look at someone,”  Dardashti describes.

Continuing, “But then, you’re attaching all these attributes to that feeling like, ‘This is meant to be. This is love at first sight. This is something inexplicable. It felt electric, and therefore, it must be love.”

But that isn’t necessarily the case. Psychologist Jenny Taitz, PhD, author of How to Be Single and Happy, said of love at first sight, 

“Just because someone is really good-looking doesn’t mean that you know that much about them,” Taitz says.

“You can run the risk of convincing yourself that they’re right for you based on your emotions rather than logic.”

Her recommendation, slow d own.

“Attraction is important, but the things that lead to long-standing relationships are kindness and shared values. You’re not going to know those things until further down the line,” she says.

https://www.essence.com/fashion/chanel-iman-on-motherhood-diversity-and-soul-cycle/

From Balenciaga to Burberry, and YSL to Versace… Chanel Iman has worked the runways of countless fashion designers and has posed for the covers of high-profile fashion magazines such as […]

The post Supermodel Chanel Iman Talks Motherhood, Diversity & Soul Cycle appeared first on Essence.

https://www.themarysue.com/avengers-endgame-is-nigh/

If you were lucky enough to score a Thursday night ticket, you could be on your way to Avengers: Endgame right now.

If you’re not in the US, chances are you may have already seen the movie, but still have to play along with the rest of us and smile benevolently at your American friends’ excitement.

It’s also the day that Doctor Strange is finally proven correct after sitting through 14,000,605 possible futures, which is only a bit longer than Endgame’s ultimate runtime.

In New York City, there was such an immediate run on tickets that I’m not bound to see Endgame again until Friday night at 11pm (RIP sleep). But many folks across the US and the world will be packing into theaters tonight. Whether or not you’re a Marvel fan, this is a day in movie-making history, and I wonder when we’ll see an event of such build-up and resulting magnitude of global box office again.

Are you headed to Endgame tonight or this weekend? What’re your plans? And if you’re just completely done with Endgame already, what’s you’re counter-programming strategy? I’ll be bingeing on episodes of Schitt’s Creek tonight to try and think about something unrelated to superheroes for, uh, roughly seven to nine hours.

There are other things happening in the world! Important things! Here are some other things we saw today:

• A nonbinary Magic: The Gathering player replaced a pro accused of harassment in Wizards of the Coast’ esports league. (via Kotaku)
• Your weird uncle who was also President Obama’s BFF announced his bid for President. Thank god, I don’t think we had enough old white men in the running. (via BBC News)
• Meanwhile,
  

  NEW: Anita Hill says she is unsatisfied with her talk with Joe Biden and won’t call it an apology @SherylNYT @jmartNYT https://t.co/xr0nSS34ng

  — Amy Fiscus (@amyfiscus) April 25, 2019

• This is how Joe Biden treated Anita Hill. pic.twitter.com/brKxNZ2FD8

  — VICE News (@vicenews) April 25, 2019

• Double meanwhile, Elizabeth Warren keeps kicking policy ass and taking names. (via CNN)
• Triple meanwhile, “If Only We Valued Women Politicians Like We Admire the Hardcore Heroines of ‘Game of Thrones'” (via Rewire)
• Trump is apparently mad that he’s losing Twitter followers because that’s the kind of thing he thinks about. (via Yahoo News)

• Who is Mrs. Mysterio? pic.twitter.com/4AofKLrsxP

  — Phoni Stark (@Steph_I_Will) April 25, 2019

• New pictures from Disney’s live-action The Lion King. (via Comicbook)
• Love is real!!! A Captain America cosplayer proposed to his lady-love, a Peggy Carter cosplayer, at the Endgame premiere. This is the only good thing to happen in 2019. (via HuffPo)

What did you see today?

(images: Marvel Studios)

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—The Mary Sue has a strict comment policy that forbids, but is not limited to, personal insults toward anyone, hate speech, and trolling.—

http://www.thenerdelement.com/2019/04/19/saving-for-san-diego-comic-con-vacations-or-anything-you-want/

It is that exciting time of year again for all San Diego Comic-Con attendees. Hotel sales just happened and that two-day deposit is due (If you were one of the lucky ones to grab a spot). Concerts, parties, and off-site events will start popping up; some of which will require funds. Do not forget all the SDCC exclusives that will be calling your name come July.

If only we could all win the lottery, right? Well, the reality for me at least is that I need to start saving money for San Diego Comic Con. I am sure some of you out there received a tax refund already; (still waiting on mine) and that may or may not be all you need for comic con. However, should you find yourself in need of a bit more here is the resource I use to save for big events:

Qaptial

• iOS or Android
• https://www.qapital.com/
• Referral link Get $20 with the first goal and deposit
  https://get.qapital.com/bBYx3yFzYV
  
  

Qapital is an app for either iOs or Android that allows you to set certain goals and deposit that money towards those goals. For me, this works well because the money is removed from my account so I can’t spend it! To get started with Qapital you are required to link your Qapital account with a funding source (i.e. Bank, Investment account, MMA, etc). You do this within the Qapital app, and most major banks are listed including credit unions and investment firms. If you do not see your bank listed, you can do a quick search. My MMA provider was not listed but I found it quickly using the search feature.

Now for those of you who are wondering how secure this is, Qapital uses plaid for their encryption. Major companies like Venmo and Acorns use the same service. You can find more information on this here .

Once your funding source is linked it is time to set up your goals. Qapital offers many suggestions for your first goal, including saving to pay off debt or going on a vacation. When you create a goal, you can change the background picture of the goal to something that will help motivate you. For example, if you are saving to go to San Diego Comic-Con, slap a picture of the Funko booth right on that goal so that you can look at it daily (I may or may have that picture on mine).

There are several “rules” you can create to start saving. I use the following three rules in my savings goals.

Set and Forget Rule

The set and forget rule allows you to save any amount per day, week or month towards your goal. So say you wanted to save $5 a day, saving an average of $150 a month (used 30 days). This automatically gets deposited into your Qapital account and you don’t have to worry about doing anything yourself. You can use the set and forget rule to deduct any amount daily, weekly or monthly from your account that works within your budget.

Round up Rule

This rule is exactly as it sounds. Any time a payment is deducted from your funding account, Qapital rounds that amount to the nearest dollar (you can vary this to nearest two dollars, three dollars etc.) and deposits that difference into your Qapital account. This works best with accounts tied to a debit card you use frequently but will work on any payment made by that account including reoccurring bills and checks.

52 Week Rule

The 52-week rule is an easy way to save $1378 in 52 weeks (1 year). The “regular” way starts with $1 on week one, moves to $2 on week 2 and so on and so forth until the 52nd week where you deposit $52. The “reverse” way starts you at $52 the first week and then you work your way down to $1. If you can afford it this might be a great jump on saving for SDCC which is about 12 weeks away. You can save a little over $550 using the reverse method. Download the charts below for your reference.

Other Rules

Some other rules which I haven’t had the chance to use yet include:

The payday rule, which allows you to save a certain percentage every time you have a deposit larger than an amount you designate. If you wanted to save 10% of your paycheck and you receive a direct deposit of $1500 each payday then you can set it to take 10% of any deposit over $1499.

The guilty pleasure rule saves a set amount every time you spend money on things you shouldn’t. If I was trying to avoid spending money on Funko this month, I could set it to deduct $10 and put it into my Qapital account every time a charge is made to Funko. Your funding account is tied to Qapital so it can list all the places you have spent money over the last couple of months. You then can choose any of these places as your “guilty pleasure”.

One of the most interesting rule sets that I have yet to experience is the “IFTTT” rule. If you are not familiar with IFTTT, it is basically a service that allows apps to connect and create actions for each other. You can find out more information on that here . The premise is to allow you to save money from things like tweeting or posting on Instagram, hitting your Fitbit goal or even the temperature outside going above a certain point. There are a lot of possibilities when using IFTTT. I may not use any of these prior to San Diego Comic Con, but if you do please share your feedback on IFTTT as a saving method by posting in the comments.

Other Features

I also want to mention some things that may not be obvious. Qapital allows you to add a or partner with a saver, should you want two or more people saving towards a common goal. You can do this by clicking “add saver”. Qapital also puts a hold on your saving goals automatically if you drop below a certain amount in your funding account. This will help you avoid any overdraft fees if your balance is running low.

Qapital also has some built-in tools to help you budget and invest. I suggestion poking around the app after you have set up your savings goals to see all that it has to offer.

I hope this information helps some of you start saving towards your goals, whether it be San Diego Comic Con, New York Comic Con or just building a nest egg. Please do not feel obligated to use the referral link I am only sharing it as a way to share the $20 reward for signing up. You can always just download the app via your app store and forgo using the link. I do not work for or have any contact with Qapital outside using their app to help me with my savings goals.

The post How to save for San Diego Comic Con, Vacations or Anything You Want appeared first on The Nerd Element.